If you’re the kind of person that thrives on praise and gets a significant boost in confidence whenever you receive a compliment, then find yourself a cheerleader. Ask a friend, find an accountability partner, or hire a coach or mentor. Let them know that you work well with praise and ask them to cheer you on as you work on your confidence.
You can also boost your confidence by taking a look at how far you’ve come. You will be surprised to discover just how much you have accomplished. What better confidence could you have? You are your best cheerleader.
Today, which will be tomorrow for you, was unusually busy for me. And I don’t mean busy being busy. I had calls to make, actual meetings, and two training sessions. I missed a meeting because I could not find a link to the meeting. Then I received another business call that is good news for me.
After my dinner, I realized I still a blog post to write. Honestly, I am so tired and sleepy that all I want to do is go to bed. Then I remember I have challenged myself to thirty blogs in thirty days. I sleep now and write in the morning. I better not. I may oversleep, or there could be other interruptions preventing me from writing.
Well, I committed to writing so no sleep until I have written something to post. Now! You are probably asking yourself, why is she rambling on about what she committed to do?
It’s to illustrate how easy it is to procrastinate. When we procrastinate, it seems everything happens to keep you from finishing your project. My reason for challenging myself was to start and maintain a routine that would become a habit I would continue.
Procrastination is a minute part of the new personal development program coming soon. The launch date is dependent on COVID 19, and the government tells us to return to former lives with whatever minor changes we now have to live as the new way of living.
Click on the link https://tinyurl.com/ya4ymw8g to leave your contact information to be notified when we have our I have the web intro meeting.
Until next time, stay safe, healthy, and happy. And remember to keep the faith.
My sister and I were having a conversation about my blog, and she shared with me; she often thinks of the post I wrote about Charlie.
Charlie is the name of a short story. I wrote it as an assignment for a class in writing. My sister could not tell me why this story stayed with her, but she convinced me I should repost the story for those who may have missed reading it.
It is a short read, but I believe you will enjoy it. Leave a comment below and follow me on this blog. I will post stories, tips, suggestions, and not always from me here for your benefit and entertainment. I love hearing from you.
Charlie
I called him Charlie. There was no particular meaning behind the name other than it was the first thing that popped into my mind. Charlie always sat in the dirt by my door each morning when I left for work. He would be on the right-hand side of the steps in the soil in the morning and on the left-hand side when I returned. I started thinking of him as my little watcher. I imagined it took him all day to cross my walkway to get to the other side and back again the next morning.
Have you ever seen a snail walk or rather crawl? The snail crawls by relaxing and contracting the muscles in the foot. It has two sets of muscle fibers that can work independently of each other when moving. One contracts and pulls the front and pushes it off the front to the back. Simultaneously, the second set pulls the outer surface of the sole forward. You can see this if you place a snail on a glass surface and look from below. There are glands located in the foot that seep mucus. There is mucus on the rest of the body to protect it against the loss of water.
Snails move like earthworms and slugs. The worm and snail crawl similarly as the snail by alternating body contractions with stretching. A bread roll would look similar to a snail laid out but different because when the dough is raw, you can shape it any way you please. A snail does not have the luxury of reshaping itself.
Snails have many natural predators, and humans also pose dangers to snails—the apparent threats of stepping on them or putting salt on their fleshy part. There are species of snails highly prized in some parts of the world as human food.
Snails move slowly and usually need help from others to get around, most often by riding on Franklin’s shell. They have to produce mucus to aid in movement and to reduce friction. The mucus also helps prevent the risk of serious injuries. They are known to crawl over a razor blade without damage.
Snails are members of a group of gastropod mollusks; most members of this species secrete a spiral shell for protection. Some of the species of snails have no casings and are known as slugs.
While it is true that snails eat garden plants and vegetables, they also eat decaying plants and soil. For this reason, Charlie is allowed to live without fear of me destroying or wanting him as a delicacy as he slowly patrols my walkway.
I hope you liked the story of Charlie and the bit of information I shared about snails. Until next time, stay safe, keep the faith, and live in peace. Oh! Don’t forget to leave a comment below and signup to follow my blog.
Anytime I find information or a good story, I am more than happy to share it with you. I read an article written Shanee Moret on Linkedin and asked permission to print it here.
It is a reminder of how we sometimes take things and people for granted. Until next time, read the article, stay safe, and keep the faith.
Written by Shanee Moret – Healthcare Marketing Phenom – Content Creator – Cancer Survivor – Speaker – Goodwill Ambassador of Public Health
A friend said something to me today that I’ll never forget. He’s a truck driver that transports food across the country, and he said: “For the first time I feel like I’m important. I don’t feel like a loser.”
Before COVID19, people looked down on his job. He doesn’t have a corner office in a high rise or degrees hanging on the wall. Many acquaintances, friends, and even family, who make more money would treat him like they were more important.
Now those same people are calling him to say “thank you.” For the first time, his family is expressing how proud they are of him because he’s putting his health at risk daily to deliver an essential service. And he’s not the only one. I know cleaners, gas station attendants, waste collectors, cooks, plumbers, etc., who feel the same way.
This health pandemic has taught all of us a priceless lesson: we cannot base someone’s value in society on salary, titles, or degrees. Everyone is valuable. Agree?
I experienced that in the extreme after the loss of my son. All the things I had accomplished before the death of my son meant nothing. I suddenly became depressed, and feelings of being a failure descended on me.
The family and friends who had supported me through the many things I did in the community and with both teenagers and young adults were no longer of interest. Individuals, especially teenagers, wanted to know when I would work with them again, and I would reply soon. But soon never came, and eventually, people stopped asking.
What they didn’t understand was I felt like a failure. I had not been there to protect my 23-year-old in the military son. I spoke with God and realized and even accepted my son had completed his mission here and now returned home. He was my first. I still miss his presence, but he continues to live in my heart, and I am blessed to have three other sons, a whole army of grandchildren, and so far, seven great-grandchildren.
I was locked in the prison of the past with all my memories of him. The memories were good, but I kept asking myself if I said I love you the last time we spoke on the phone? Did he know how proud I was of him and the difference he made in the lives of so many people? I now make sure I say I love you to my children and family.
We all become prisoners of our minds at some time in our lives. Most of the time, we can break the chains and walk away. For some of us, it is not always so easy. We get trapped in there, and that is when the negative self-talk begins. The longer we stay there, the stronger it becomes, and you need help getting back to who you are. That is when someone like Denise B. Schaad can help guide you to the light.
Denise was able to share how vulnerable she was and the struggle she went through and survived. I commend her for the journey she took and the place she is now.
I love sharing stories like these, and I hope you enjoyed reading it. To learn more about these types of stories, and others to help you, follow me here and leave a comment. Until next time, please stay safe and keep the faith.
Hi! I woke this morning feeling super fantastic, and I felt compelled to share one of my weaknesses with you.
Do you have a problem with procrastination? I do. Not because I don’t want to do the task or the project. But because I overload myself with things to do and then I run into the problem of deciding which to do first.
So, I get myself a cup of coffee while determining which needs priority attention. The results I end up wasting precious time I can never recover. That gets my goat. Now I am angry at myself, which does not make for an excellent working day.
I stumbled across an article on how to overcome procrastination. Of course, that caught my interest, so I read it and thought it made a few good points. That is why I am writing about it because maybe you or someone you know is dealing with this same problem.
One of the things suggested is to write down every task, activity, event, or goal that you put off. Then list the things you do instead, and how long it takes you to do those other things.
Second, you should organize the items in areas such as distractions, work, household, social and relationships, health, decisions, and anything category you may think is essential.
Third, try to determine your procrastination patterns. What is the real reason you are putting off that project, and how can you break that pattern?
Four, what kind of self-talk are you using to justify putting off working on your commitment?
Everyone procrastinates at some point in their lives, but it is not because they are lazy. It could be you’ve accepted tasks you have no knowledge or skill to handle the projects, and rather than admit you need help, you push it aside as if you will magically gain the understanding in time to complete the job.
You’re not alone! It happens to even the best of us. My advice is to follow the steps mentioned and, if necessary, break them down into even smaller tasks within each category. Remember, the best way to eat an elephant is one bite at a time.
If you enjoyed this article and others on this blog, please sign up to follow me here or email me at lawanna@lawannaspeaks.com. I will especially love it if you shared my blogs with your friends if you find them helpful.
Okay! I am taking another break from my serious article writing today. Some of you may be wondering why I am writing about confidence so much.
My reason is in my advancing years; confidence is a battle I fight all the time. I thought there might be others, not necessarily in my age bracket, who may be experiencing that same battle.
I want you to know you are not alone. I am here to support you when you need a booster. You can email me at lawanna@lawannaspeaks.com or call me at 916 246-8731.
I will write more articles on confidence, and then I will move on to another area I feel will need exploring. I haven’t decided what the subject will be, but if you have something you would like me to explore, please leave a comment or email me.
Now onto a little human interest story. My grandson bought me a bag of circus peanut candy. While I was thanking him for his gracious gift, he laughed and said, “Gram, I don’t know anyone that eats that candy!”
I told him the only place I have found this candy is at the Dollar Store, which is where he bought the candy for me, has run out more than one time. Therefore, I am not the only one purchasing the candy.
The candy brings back memories of when I was a kid, and it was one of my favorite candy when I could afford to buy it. It is also my Pleasure food when reading, writing, or watching television.
So, I was wondering if any of you know people who eat Circus Peanut candy or have some other thing they do to relax when at home. You can leave me a note in the comment section. I would love to hear from you.
Look well into thyself; there is a source of strength which will always spring up if thou wilt always look. Marcus Aurelius
5 Signs you have low confidence
There are reasons why you have low confidence. Neighborhood children bullied you as a child, parents ripped into you rather than build you up. A friend or significant other left you wallowing in self-pity. You suffer from low self-esteem. We are all only human, and our confidence made fragile by life, circumstance, and how we face those incidents. Whatever the reason, if you lack confidence, you will not feel smart enough, attractive enough, or good enough. If you concerned about your confidence levels, take a look at these five signs that you lack confidence.
1. Explaining Yourself
Do you regularly make excuses or try to justify your actions? For example, a friend invites you to a party. You are busy, but you feel you need to explain why you are unable to attend. A simple, “I am unable to make it,” is all you to say. However, you tell a story of exactly why you will not be able to attend. When you are confident, you do not need to explain your actions. Because you are unable to participate in a party that does not change who you are as a person. The same goes for when you make a mistake; it is not necessary to make a million excuses as to why it happened. You are human, and as a human, we make mistakes all the time. When you make excuses and try to explain yourself continuously, you are showing signs of low confidence.
2. Responding To Criticism
No one likes to be criticized, even if it is helpful. How do you react to criticism? Are you aggressive and immediately take offense when someone makes a critical comment? It could be something simple as your performance was not as well at our weekly meeting. Your friend has made a comment on your presentation, and you immediately come up with an excuse, and you do so somewhat aggressively. You have shown a lack of confidence. Even if it is not pleasant to hear, a confident person can handle criticism. A confident person has the strength to determine whether it’s constructive or not. If it is, then they accept it and make the necessary changes for improvement and if it is not, they dismiss it and move on.
3. Compensation
Someone comments that you look sad, and you immediately deny it. You don’t just dismiss that you’re feeling depressed, you claim you are never upset. However, that is not the case; your overcompensating for lack of confidence is usually a common trait in people with low confidence. We all compensate in our way. Some, through arrogance, others react like the example above. We have points of strength and weakness, that’s okay – you don’t have to compensate because of that.
4. Perfectionism
We often claim perfectionism as a strength. It isn’t. It’s a sign that we lack confidence. We believe it is pushing us to success. Instead, it’s putting us under undue pressure because there is no such thing as perfect. Since it’s unachievable, you are setting yourself up for failure. You can not be perfect, so your going after perfection is going to lead to disappointment and a constant lowering of your confidence. People with confidence aren’t perfectionists, but they always work to succeed.
5. Indecisiveness
When you lack confidence, you will struggle to make a decision, even when it is as simple as where to grab dinner or something more significant. You become so riddled with doubt you become paralyzed by the choices you face. What if you make the wrong choice? What if your decision leads to criticism of weighing pros and cons. Do you have trouble believing in your ability to make decisions, or your friends distrusting you because of it? They don’t trust themselves to make intelligent decisions or the right choice so, and they struggle to make a decision.
Remember, you are better than the sum of your past. Until next time, keep the faith.
Be faithful to that which exists within yourself. – Andre Gide –
I am working hard to keep my commitment to myself to do 30 days of posting on this blog each day without missing. Because I have not finished my article, I am posting a couple of my attempts at writing poems. I hope you enjoy them as much as I had fun writing them.
From time to time, I will interject something I have written in the past when I run into a time crunch to keep my commitment to you and to add a little levity to keep you from getting bored with the same old thing.
I hope you are enjoying this blog. I love to have you like and share the blog posts and become a follower.
He Didn’t Know
He smiled with moral superiority
as he explained,
doing things his way,
would make my life better.
He had no idea
of how I had come to be here.
He didn’t know
My life may not be perfect,
but it was one I built.
I began with nothing
and barely surviving,
to living the life I created.
He didn’t know
His was his birth rite
His position his for the taking.
I watched his smile,
my hands were itching to strike.
He didn’t know
The damage I wanted to cause him.
But that was no longer me.
So, I smiled and nodded,
anxious for him to leave,
and life to go on as I created.
But then, he didn’t know
The Crest
By the end of the day,
my plans to go out
for a night of play,
ended with my doubt.
Which, caused me to stress
because I feared
going alone to The Crest,
a place all revered
That’s it for now. In a few hours, I will post a new post on confidence. I hope you experienced some pleasure in reading my efforts at writing poems. Until next time, please be careful and keep the faith.
You’re confident, but do you have self-esteem? Or is it the other way around? Or could it be both?
Confidence and self-esteem are closely related, and they can influence one another; however, they aren’t the same. It is good to have both, and great to keep in check, but the two each develop in specific ways in different situations.
What is Self-Esteem?
Self-esteem is how you see yourself. Individuals with good self-esteem are comfortable with the things they do and usually good with people. They’re not afraid to try new things. A person with good self-esteem is willing to place themselves in challenging positions of opportunity. When you have a healthy sense of self-worth, it has become developed in challenging situations in which others are supportive. They don’t just tell you what you want to hear.
If your self-esteem is too low, you are afraid to try new things; then you lose interest in doing the things you once enjoyed. Worse, the things you were good at doing. Low self-esteem can develop from failure or a series of failures. For you to recover requires a combination of support and encouragement from family and friends, but most importantly, from getting up and trying again.
Low self-esteem can also be the result of an emotionally abusive environment. Some people can develop a positive self-image despite the abuser or abusers. However, the best way to remedy this situation is to leave it.
When your self-esteem is too high, you may begin to think you are more important or more valuable than other people. You may look for possible ways to abuse power, break the rules, or you may begin to engage in risky behaviors.
High self-esteem can develop after a significant success or a series of victories. However, what happens when checked by failure, challenge on your authority, or merely a challenge? It can develop in environments too supportive – people praise the good that you do but never point out errors or concerns. Your self-esteem gets checked when you leave that environment or experience challenges on your authority.
What is Confidence
Confidence is different. It can change in different situations and environments. A child who is sheepish and nervous at home may feel ready to take on the world when they are at school where friends and supportive teachers surround them.
A man who keeps his head down and his mouth shut at work may feel like a king when he returns home. At home, he fixes a chair for his wife, or he helps his kids with homework.
Like self-esteem can be too high or too low, an ungodly amount of confidence for a given situation can lead to problems.
A person with too much confidence may take on challenges that they are not prepared to accept. If they are not confident enough, they will not try to come up with new ideas, suggestions, or offer their help in times of need.
Self-esteem and confidence are a combination of the experiences you’ve had in the past. The overall level of support you received from similar situations in the past can determine your present outcome.
How are Self-Esteem and Confidence Related?
Confidence and self-esteem do impact one another. A person with high confidence in several situations you will feel increased self-esteem. You think you can handle several jobs, and it makes sense you are more satisfied with who you are as a person.
Confidence comes from your personal experience. The experience is necessary to build trust in your abilities. When your self-esteem is low, you are less likely to feel confident because you are less likely to build confidence by trying new things.
If you would like to learn more about confidence and self-esteem, call me at 916 246-8731, email me at lawannaspeaks.com, or schedule an interview appointment
LaWanna Parker Blog 